New Bedtime Rule?

I have terrible sleeping habits.  I am a terrible night owl and also suffer from insomnia.  This is something that also occasionally gets me into trouble with my husband.  Regular readers already know this as I've mentioned in it several previous posts.

Being on holiday has made this problem even worse!  Ok, I'm going to give Wilma a few minutes here to pick herself up off the floor and clean up her morning cup of coffee she just spluttered all over her kitchen reading that statement.  She KNOWS exactly what I am talking about!

Truth be told, my husband and I are both terrible night owls and during this time off work neither of us have been getting to bed at a reasonable hour, or even close to it.

Most nights my husband has to tell me to go to bed.  No problem when he is here.  When he is away he will ring or text and tell me to go to bed, which I do.  The problem is that I then proceed to settle down with a bedtime drink, pick up my phone and trawl the internet, read blogs, even comment on some etc.   It can be up to an hour and a half after he tells me to go to bed that I actually finally settle down to lights out.  I have also been known to pick up the phone during the night and check emails.  Sheesh .. no wonder you have problems sleeping Roz!  yeah yeah, I know!

Obviously this is something we are both going to have to work on prior to going back to work.

This afternoon we were sitting together cuddling during by the beach and I mentioned how bad these habits had become.  He lifted my chin up to meet his face so that I had to look him in the eye and kept his hand there so that I couldn't look away

Ok.  No more phone.  No more blogs in bed.  Understand?  this was said with that 'or else' look

Yes Sir

This

Equals this

And hopefully results in this

I'm not really sure if this a rule as such, but it is an expectation and that's all that matters.  There will be consequences for not meeting it and quite frankly, I'm a little worried.  I can see myself getting a very sore butt more than once over this.

Ok, I know what you're going to say.  Just turn off the phone ... right?  Simple.  In theory yes.  But, it is such a habit and also so tempting, especially if don't really feel like going to sleep.  I also prefer to leave the phone on when Rick is away.  Just in case.  Also, so that I don't miss him if he rings or text the next morning (although I don't always hear it ... he he).

This is going to take some effort and willpower on my part.  Perhaps I should just get used to turning the phone off.  I really don't want to let my husband down on this.

As a side note, Rick was away last night and when I went out to pick him up for our outing this afternoon I was confronted with a Police checkpoint, checking for drivers licence and vehicle warrant of fitness.  Although I knew I had nothing to worry about anxiety set in.  I don't know why really.  Of course, I left the checkpoint no problem.  I told Rick about the checkpoint when I met him and told him I was more than happy for him to take over driving as I was feeling a bit unnerved.  I mentioned something about authority figures.  He just looked at me with a big knowing smile on his face as if to say you know whose authority you have to watch out for.

Funny how these situations make me even more nervous now.  Knowing that any trouble with the Police will mean A LOT of trouble with my husband!

Shopping For A Collar

No, not one like that

We went out shopping today to spend some vouchers we had been given for Christmas.

A while ago my husband expressed a desire to purchase a piece of jewellery for me.  Not just any piece,  a piece that must be worn at all times and only removed either by him or with his permission (with blanket permission for when I take a shower).

This will be a symbol of our commitment to each other and our love.  It is also to remind me of him and his dominance at all times, especially when we are apart.

We had a lot of fun looking around the stores together and finally decided on:

this

(the photo is a bit hard to see but hopefully you get the idea).  

Afterwards, my husband said the following:

You know what I see in this?  The plain half represents me, the sparkly, pretty side represents you and the Sapphire heart brings us together

We are going to set aside a special time where he will fasten the pendant around my neck, effectively 'collaring' me.

The idea feels a bit strange to me at the moment, but I think I am going to love my new 'collar'.  Knowing what it represents and the fact that it will be our little secret.  It will be in plain view around my neck to the outside world, but only we will know its true meaning.

As a side note.  I was reminded of Christina's recent post today also.  At one point while we were out driving Rick pulled over to manoeuvre into a park.  He had basically stopped the car but had not yet pulled the hand brake or turned off the ignition.

What did I do?

Yep, you guessed it.  I undid my seat belt.

OOPS

I immediately got 'the look' accompanied with had I turned the ignition off??

Holiday Tales and Promised Spankings

Reading various posts recently it seems the Christmas/New year period is a difficult time for those of us in ttwd relationships.  With the usual stresses, hustle and bustle of the season, coupled with being around more people the dynamic takes a bit of a back seat.  For some of us, that also means our submission also takes a bit of a back seat.

Well, it seems I have not been immune to this phenomenon.  I mean, I haven't exactly been in trouble, or slipped that badly, but the focus I usually have hasn't been there and my husband have been lenient with the tiny indiscretions.

That is, he was being lenient.  He has since told me that we need to refocus on "us" and that some role affirmation is definitely required to help the process of refocusing.  Sheesh - can't I just enjoy my holiday?  Regular readers here will know that role affirmation is something fairly new to us.

It is summer here but the weather has been a bit up and down, we've had some lovely warm sunny days, days of torrential rain and days of horrendous gale force winds, although the temperature has remained quite warm. 

Since the hustle and bustle of the Christmas/new year period we have been enjoying the nice days, taking time out for us and going on afternoon 'dates' to favourtie places.  I call them dates because that is exactly what it feels like.  We have taken nice seaside strolls hand in had, visited a lot of favourite cafes and visited places we either haven't been to before or haven't been to for a while.

We have had a lot of fun together just focusing on us and as a result it feels like we are both now 'rediscovering' our roles again after the Christmas madness.  OK, maybe I am rediscovering mine a little slower than he is :)

The other day we went to a favourtie park, visited the cafe then lay in the sun together just talking and cuddling, watching the myriad of other people there playing various games.  It was a lovely afternoon.  There was lots of loving conversation during which he said something about loving how connected we are.

Later that day he had to go out for the evening.  Before he left I threw my arms around him, kissed him and batted my eyes

Honey

Yes sweetheart

I don't know if we really need role affirmation now

This was met with lots of laughter from him before he kissed me

Nice try angel

Dang!  Can't blame a girl for trying though.

I'm enjoying this time together.  I really should be getting on with some of the 'stuff' I usually do during part of the holidays.  You know, cleaning inside of windows, cleaning cupboards etc.  But, there is still time for that ... and it will be back to work and back to reality soon enough - sigh!

Confessing

Whenever I do something wrong - break a rule or do anything that I know my husband wont approve of I always confess it to him.

Why do I confess to my husband?  Because he expects it.  He trusts me to carry out his instructions, follow his leadership and rules and expects me to come to him and tell him when I fail to do so.  However, that is not the only reason.

I have consented to my husband taking the lead in our relationship and I trust him to make the best decisions for me and for us.  As part of this, he sets guidelines for us both to follow.  The rules, guidelines he sets are in place either for my own benefit, to help me become a better person, or for the benefit of our relationship.

If I don't follow his leadership, how can I expect him to lead?  If I don't follow his leadership, how can we expect to receive the benefits of living this lifestyle and to grow together?

My husband holds himself to a very high standard and when he makes a mistake he owns it. He takes responsibility, confesses to me and apologises.  Just as he expects it of me, I also expect the same of him.

To not confess, in my opinion, would be dishonest and a betrayal of the trust he has put in me to follow his leadership.  By the same token, the same applies to him.  To not confess would be a betrayal of the trust I have in him as our leader.

Is it easy to confess?  No.  It is something I wrestle with internally for a while before taking the plunge and starting that sometimes difficult conversation, knowing that I am going to disappoint him and seeing that disappointment in his eyes.

Of course, knowing that it may lead to some unpleasant consequences for me also gives me pause.  But, as part of our ttwd relationship I have also agreed to be held accountable by my husband for my actions.  If I do something he would otherwise be unaware of, but for me confessing it, I cannot be held accountable and that means the behaviour isn't modified.

I don't handle the feelings of remorse and guilt I have by not telling my husband very well. Also, if I don't confess it means I get away with it (so to speak) and that leads to me feeling less submissive overall which of course, never ends well.

Confessing is not easy, but it is by far better to confess and accept any consequences of that confession so that the slate is clean and we can move forward.  

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year everyone!  

Rick and I wish you every blessing for the year ahead.  Oh, and for you spankos ... much spanking!

We feel very blessed by our friends in this community and thank you all for your support and encouragement and look forward to continued friendships as we enter this new year.  We have been doing ttwd for just over a year now and couldn't have come this far without the amazing support from all of you.

In a couple of previous posts I kinda joked about how I just may be the first Dd wife to be spanked in 2013 given our location and time zone ...  hmm, such a dubious honour I think!  Anyway, just in case you are curious, it has NOT happened ... yet!  so I think it's probably safe to say I have been saved that 'honour'.  Sorry to you spankos out there, or those of you who may have been betting on me being the first (in which case I need new friends!)  In fact, the last spanking was a while ago now so I am worried about how my bottom will take the next spanking being so out of practice. (yay for me huh!)

I find it disconcerting this time of year how being such a busy time and being with family etc Dd takes a bit of a back seat.  I want to get back to our 'normal' again and feel as though I have been trying to take a bit too much control and loosing my submissive self lately.  I want to refocus on Dd.

I said as much to my husband today and it seems he doesn't see it quite the same way and is happy with my behaviour (a very good thing!).  He also said that Dd is always a focus for us.

Here's to 2013.  I hope it brings you health, love, happiness and many, many blessings! Some of our bloggy friends are expecting either first or subsequent babies or grand babies this year.  I am so excited for you and share in your joy!

I am truly thankful for the many blessings I have which include my husband, family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

I can't believe Christmas is now right upon us!  I'm now prepared and looking forward to spending the day with family.  I am also looking forward to some time off work with my husband, spending some time with family and some much need R&R.

The events in Newton last week to me is a reminder of how fragile life is and that we should count the many blessings we have.  My heart goes out to those families affected by this tragedy this Christmas.

I feel extremely blessed by my husband, family and friends.  This Christmas I am also blessed and extremely thankful to include all of you as friends.  When I started this blog almost a year ago now, I never imagined the wealth of support, encouragement and advice I would receive.  Not to mention the friendships developed.  My only regret is that I didn't start sooner.

Thank you all so much for your support, encouragement, advice and friendship.  Rick and I are both truly grateful.  I am amazed at the connections we have made.  These connections may not be face to face, but they are as important to us as our 'real life' friends.

I wish we could all get together and celebrate the season.  How wonderful that would be!  We ladies could chat over a glass of submission wine and the guys could chat about how badly behaved angelic their wives/partners are ...  On second thought, that last bit might not be such a good idea!

With the craziness of the last week or so I haven't been able to visit all of you.  Please accept my apologies.  To those of you who have recently contacted me for the first time, welcome!  It is always a thrill to meet new friends and I apologise that I haven't yet been able to pay you a visit.  I promise to do so in the new year!

Christmas is a time to focus on loved ones.  Enjoy opening presents, good food and all the other usual trimmings.  However, we must remember the true meaning of Christmas.  To celebrate the birth of Jesus.

Rick and I wish you all a very Merry Christmas.  We hope you have a safe and blessed Christmas with loved ones and a relaxing and enjoyable holiday.  We will be absent from blogland between Christmas and new year and looking forward to seeing you all safe and well in 2013.

Christmas - Kiwi Style

My dear friend Wilma has been trying to encourage me in finding the Christmas spirit recently.  Lucy has also joined in by sending me some lovely Christmassy Snoopy pics.  The idea being to replace Scrappy with a happy Snoopy.

Wilma posted this the other day and I commented that I had indeed found the Christmas spirit now.  She didn't seem overly convinced so I thought what better way to convince her that her efforts had worked than by posting some Christmas pics?  Also, I realised I haven't posted anything Christmassy yet!  Shame on you Roz!  ....

... well, there was my last spank free Christmas post, but I guess that doesn't really count.  By the way, it seems most of you actually want a Christmas spanking!  Here was me trying to do something helpful and nice for my fellow submissive wives!  Sheesh - you guys are a tough crowd!

Anywaaay, I digress.  I wanted to find a picture, or clip of a Christmas Scrappy, but alas, that mission appeared um somewhat unsuccessful (oh shush Wilma!)

He really isn't that grumpy you know.  He just wants to be the good guy and fight injustice and the bad guys.

I hope this convinces you that Scrappy isn't always that bad :)

Now for a little Snoopy.  This is really for me :)  I love listening to Snoopy's Christmas every year.  I hope you enjoy

and more Snoopy.  This is the picture sent by Lucy.  Thank you Lucy :)

I want to share a bit of Kiwiana with you.  The tree below is the Pohutukawa tree, or New Zealand Christmas tree.  So named because it flowers at Christmas time

And because it's summer here, a nice scene of a New Zealand beach and a pair of uniquely kiwi jandals  (or thongs, depending on where you're from)

Pukeko in a Ponga Tree 

This is the New Zealand version of the 12 days of Christmas.  Here's what you need to know:

Pukeko: NZ native bird know as  swamp hen
Ponga: NZ tree fern
Kumera: Sweet potato
Piupiu: Skirt or kilt made from strips of flax
Haka: Traditional Maori war dance
Pipi: Small clam or shellfish
Puha: A type of sow thistle eaten as a vegetable in NZ
Pois: Maori word for ball - two balls of the end of rope that are twirled around to make patterns during a Maori dance
Huhu Grub: Small edible bug or beetle found in NZ

On the first day of Christmas

My true love gave to me

A pukeko in a ponga tree

On the second day of Christmas

My true love gave to me

Two kumera

And a pukeko in a ponga tree

On the third day of Christmas

and so on, until

On the twelfth day of Christmas

My true love gave to me

Twelve piupius swinging

Eleven haka lessons

Ten juicy fish heads

Nine sacks of pipis

Eight plants of puha

Seven eels a swimming

Six pois a twirling

Five big fat pigs!

Four huhu grubs

Three flax kits

Two kumera

And a pukeko in a ponga tree!

and just to finish, a slightly more 'traditional' scene for you