Wednesday, 11 April 2012

PMS = Lines

I must always show respect to my husband, not matter what my mood.

This was the 100 lines I had to write one night last week.  (It has taken me a while to get around to this post).  This particular punishment is one I hate with a passion (please just go ahead and spank me already instead!)  I find it very humbling and embarrassing (yes, more so than being over Rick's knee, strangely enough!) and wonder how other dd women feel about having to write lines.

Rick has his own way of administering lines which makes the punishment more intense.  First comes the lecture, then the writing (in a quiet place with no distractions), then, before getting into bed that night I have to recite the lines the same number of times I had to write them (usually 100).  Once this is done, I then have to present the lines to him where he looks them over and gives another lecture.  I find this part very embarrassing and humbling, watching him as he peruses my handiwork.  There is always a "closing" lecture of some form or another with any punishment.  Rick insists on this to ensure he has got his message across effectively.

Why did I have to write the lines?  Well, I had been in an extremely bad mood all day, overreacting to everything and snapping at everyone.  I even gave my boss attitude when he asked me to do something (oops!).

Unfortunately, I carried on taking my mood out on Rick, grumping about this, that and the other thing and wasn't very responsive to him.  He was particularly not impressed with how I had behaved toward my boss.  He tried to make light of things and joke around a bit to shift my mood.  Unfortunately, I was not in the mood for this and might have, kinda told him he was talking rubbish and I might have said it with a surly tone.

Excuse me?  What did you just say to me?!!
(Oh crap) silence
I hope you were joking
(gulp) silence
Have you got something to say to me?
(deep breath, trying to correct tone) I'm sorry
Hmm, that wasn't acceptable or appropriate was it
No Sir

I would like to blame it on PMS.  It gets me nearly every time, I get into an extremely dark mood and become stressed about everything and aggressive.  Nobody is safe from my wrath!  I know this happens and expect it, but it gets the best of me nearly every time.  I can't seem to find a way to cope with it in a more appropriate way.

I have seen a number of comments on other blogs on the topic of PMS.  Is it a mitigating factor for undesirable behaviour?  Should the HoH make allowances and cut the wife some slack during this time.  Well, I guess my HoH's answer would be no!  I actually asked him this (after I had done my lines of course) and he said he does take into account that the behaviour is hormonal and make certain allowances but, at the end of the day, it is no excuse for either breaking rules or showing disrespect toward him.

We have been doing ttwd for about 7 months now, we had dabbled a couple of times previously and it just didn't quite work for us.  This time we seem to hit the "formula" right.  Rick has become more strict lately, he thinks it has been long enough now that we need to step up more in our individual roles, and it has had wonderful results and brought us even closer.  I was spanked the previous Saturday for breaking a couple of rules and then this incident happened a couple of days later so, for now at least, I am definitely watching my Rs & R (rules and respect).  Wish me luck!