Sunday 4 August 2013

An Update and When the HoH Makes A Mistake

I want to start by saying thank you so much for your lovely comments on my previous post and thank you to those of you who have contacted me over the last couple of weeks.  I can't express enough just how much your loving care and concern has meant to us.  Thank you so much for thinking of us and keeping us in your prayers.

Two weeks on we are still be rocked by aftershocks.  Most of them  are small and we aren't noticing them.  However, every now and then a larger one arrives.  All this leaves me still feeling a little unnerved.  I can't help it.  It's the fear of the unknown and whether we will have another, more sizable quake.

Mother Nature is being rather quirky right now (definitely a woman! LoL).  She has given us earthquakes to deal with on one hand and blessed us with some lovely weather on the other.  We have had a fairly long run of lovely fine, sunny days with temperatures hovering around 13 - 14 degrees Celsius.  Not bad for the middle of winter!  Having said that though, I believe the forecast for the coming week is for some showers and rain.  Oh well, I guess we can't complain since we haven't seen any rain for a while now.

Last week saw a major challenge for both our relationship and dynamic.  One of the things about DD is that it is unequal.  By that, I am not in any way saying we are not equal partners, but the HoH leads the relationship and the TiH submits to this authority.  This division of power is no more evident than when it comes to consequences for ones actions.  As TiH's we have certain rules to follow and behaviours expected of us and when we fail to adhere to those rules, or to meet expectations there is a consequence.  We are spanked, there is forgiveness, a reconnection and the issue has been dealt with and put behind us (pardon the pun).

What then happens when the HoH makes a mistake?  We are all after all only human and as much as we like to think of our HoH as infallible, being human means they are fallible sometimes,  Just like us.  However, unlike us there is no such consequence for his actions.  Actually, I don't think that is entirely true, but I will get to that later.  How do we as the TiH feel when the HoH makes a mistake and how do we resolve those feelings?  What about his feelings?  He is likely feeling the same feelings of remorse, disappointment etc that we feel when we make a mistake.

I hope what follows does not come across as an attack on Rick.  It is certainly not my intention.  I want this blog to be an honest account of our journey.  All of it, not just the good parts.  Also, I hope publishing this may be helpful to some of you. Rick has read this BTW.

To put it bluntly, Rick made a huge mistake last week.  I knew something was amiss and started asking questions and he confessed his actions.  This left him feeling incredibly guilty and me feeling disappointed and confused.  This particular issue is one that we have dealt with in the past.  In fact, it last reared its head not long after we started our DD journey.  Neither of us really knew at the time how to deal with it and it nearly derailed our dynamic.  We worked hard to deal with the situation and get past it and to continue our journey into DD.

Given the history, I was astounded that we were once again faced with this issue.  It has caused so much distance and lack of trust before that I felt sure it would not happen again.  After all, some of the cornerstones of any good relationship and particularly a DD relationship are honesty and trust.

I felt devastated and disappointed.  It also made me question my trust in Rick and worst, how much I mean to him if he could do this.

Rick on the other hand has been feeling deeply remorseful and unworthy of leading us.  We nearly decided to put our dynamic on hold for a while to allow us to deal with the issue.

Back to consequences - I mentioned above that there are no consequences when the HoH makes a mistake.  Well, I don't believe that is entirely true.  No, there is no spanking or any other punishment.  That's not to say there are no consequences however. He has to deal with his own feelings of remorse and work hard to regain the trust in him that has been lost while continuing to lead his family.  In some cases he has probably lost some confidence in himself as a leader as well.  He has to make amends.

We have had some tough conversations this week in an attempt to move forward and we are slowly getting back on track.  I know we will come out the other end of this and perhaps be even stronger.  Rick has worked extremely hard to reassure me of his love for me and his commitment to us.  I know he loves me and that he is committed to us, but this did knock me for a six and left me questioning.

Though we had this misstep.  Rick is my HoH and my Daddy and I love him unconditionally, more than anything and I know we will weather this storm.

71 comments:

  1. I am so sorry you've had such a rough couple of weeks. We've hit a rough spot here too and I empathize with you. I have no advice, no sage words of wisdom, but offer virtual (((hugs))) to you. I hope you and your Daddy come out stronger.

    hugs
    p

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    1. Thank you P, and for the hug ... I felt it :)

      I'm sorry you have hit a rough spot too and hope that you are working through it too. We are getting there. I'm sure we will both come out of it stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  2. Roz,
    I'm so sorry! Somehow I missed your last post. What a scary time for everyone there. I really hope everything in the earthquake area settles down completely. As for your question here, I think a sincere apology from your HOH would be the first think I would want and I think you got that. I know Rogue method works well for them. I'm glad you are moving forward and I hope you keep it up.

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    1. Thank you PK, It has certainly been an unnerving time.

      Yes, he did apologise and we have been working hard to re-build trust and connect. It has actually been harder on him. We are slowly moving forward and I know we will get back on track.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  3. Oh Roz,
    I'm sorry for you, and sorry too that I didn't comment on your last post, I thought I had!
    It seems very important to me that your HOH has accepted all responsibility and admitted his wrongdoings, that is a great place to start and from there you must be able to work out a way forward.
    Hugs
    J

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    1. Hi Janey,

      Thank you so much for your lovely words. Yes, he certainly has accepted responsibility and I think this is actually harder on him than me in a lot of ways. We are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  4. Roz, I'm sorry you have to go through this, but in the other hand, this is what is called life.
    We all make errors, and we all regret them.
    What bothers me a little with DD is that if a man makes a mistake, he is expected to do as adults do: Apologize, perceive what happened, and make plans to not repeat it. That it hurts the soul .. it is part of the game. This is what we teach our children to deal with problems, all of these steps.

    I would like the women in DD could do the same without having to go through the spanking as a child, and then everything is solved.
    In my eyes, it is not an adult way of dealing with problems, but the other side, you know my views on punishment .. lol ..

    Roz, in adult life is all about: to forgive.
    Next time you will need to be forgiven. Even without spanking .... lol .. if I were to decide .. lol ..
    Yes, it is so, we are not angels, we are only human. And R is also just a person who makes wrong time and time again, through these errors is learning to become a better person, until the next time he falls again.

    And all this spectacle is called: LIFE.

    Many hugs to you, Roz.

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    1. Thank you Mona :)

      You are so right, we do all make mistakes and it's how we handle it that matters. We are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Spanking certainly isn't for any couple. It's hard to explain just why it works, but it does for us :) It helps us both let go of the emotions involved with the situation and move forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  5. Roz,

    I'm new, but have been reading snippets of your blog when the time allows. First off, I grew up in a place that earthquakes were very much of the norm. I completely felt your trepidation, worry, fear, and anxiety in your posts. I hope each day gets better and mother nature finally calms her bitchiness. Maybe she needs a good spanking?

    You have brought up a great subject matter. In fact, it really made me think as I was reading it. I do look at my Sir as if he is infallible. His mannerism is the reason. I never see any weakness. Maybe this is part of my struggle with letting go 100%. In the back of my mind I fear that when He becomes fallible it will crush me. Not only will I not understand it, but that I won't be able to give the support He needs to allow us move forward. I think I need to talk to Him.

    I send my best as you and your HoH get back on track.

    H.S.

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    1. Hi H.S., Welcome! Thank you so much for reading and for your lovely comment.

      Earthquakes are reasonably common here, but not this magnitude or number of aftershocks.

      Because we look to them to lead us, it is so hard when they make a mistake, but I think going through these struggles makes us stronger. This is harder on him than me I think. I like what you say about giving him the support he needs to allow us to move forward. That is exactly where we are at the moment. We are slowly moving forward and I know we will get back on track.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  6. I am sorry you are still dealing with the aftershocks and fears of the earthquake! Horrible.

    I think what you are describing is normal...! But as you say he is your HOH and isn't punished by you. I always feel better when I hear an HOH is fallible since that makes them human. Maybe he could give himself a consequence. It may help him relieve his guilt. I do not know what it would be, but if it helps him....?
    I like the way you handle this since you recognize there are always going to be bumps in the road.
    Best wishes hon!

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    1. Thank you Minelle :)

      It has certainly been a tough and unnerving time.

      We are all only human and therefore fallible. I think because we look to them to lead us, it makes it harder when they make a mistake. However, how we deal with that is what is important and yes, there are always bumps in the road.

      We are slowly moving forward and I know we will get back on track.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  7. I am so sorry things have been so rough for you the last couple of weeks.

    We are all fallible and look for forgiveness. Trust is something that is easily broken and difficult to gain. I hope you and Rog will find your way back again to that and soon.

    Hugs.

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    1. Sorry meant Rick not Rog. It's those "R" names, Ray being one. I keep trying to call him Roy.

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    2. Thank you Sunny :)

      It is difficult once trust has been broken, but we are working through it and slowly moving forward. This has been harder on him I think.

      LoL no worries ... I guess I am responsible for at least some of those "R" names :)

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  8. Oh Roz, I'm sorry for the shaky ground...both the literal and the figurative. It sounds like you and Rick are well on your way to solid ground again though, and hopefully Mother Nature is as well!

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    1. Thank you Tess,

      It is hard, but we are working through it, communicating a lot and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  9. Hi Roz, I am so sorry that you have had such a rough couple of weeks, The earthquakes must be terrible but I suppose they have faded into the background with the rest of your troubles. It is really hard to accept when our leaders make mistakes, we perceive them as escaping scot free when in reality they don't as they have to work harder to gain our submission and trust. I hope that you two can get past this soon
    love Jan.xx

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    1. Thank you Jan:)

      I think that fact that we look to them to lead makes it more difficult when they make a mistake. You are so right, there are definitely consequences, just not the same ones. Trust has to be re-established. This has been harder on Rick than me.

      We are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  10. Awww, Roz, what a rough few weeks for you. Though it's been difficult, it sounds like you both are handling it wisely.
    I hope things just keep getting better.
    Hugs!

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    1. Thank you Sarah :)

      It has definitely been a difficult time, but we are working through it and slowly moving forward. I really hope we will be back on track soon.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  11. You know what? It sucks that they screw up. but I see it as a chance for us to be BIGGER than all this and be gracious about accepting their apology.

    I'm glad even tho the ground beneath you is shaky, your faith in Rick isn't!

    You know you'll come out much stronger on the other side! *hugs*

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    1. Thank you Fondles :)

      I think it's harder cos we do look to them to lead. I agree, an apology and acceptance of it are important ... and that has happened here. This has been harder on him than me I think. We are working through it and slowly moving forward. Hopefully we will come out of this stronger, as so often seems to be the case.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  12. Roz I've been thinking about you but never seem to have the right words. I'm sorry there's so much shaking of the earth and at home. It's hard to rebuild trust. Have faith that it'll get better. Hugs!!!!

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    1. Thank you so much Chickadee :) It has certainly been difficult, but we are working at it and slowly moving forward. I know we will get back on track and hope we will come out of it even stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  13. Roz, sorry to hear your troubles have continued. I do hope you and Rick find yourself on solid ground again, I sure you two have the strength to find a way forward.
    Big hugs!!!
    DF

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    1. Thank you DF :)

      We are not quite there yet, but are working on it and slowly moving forward and I know we will get back on track.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  14. Hey Roz...sorry to hear that you are still having aftershocks and then had to deal with the personal 'earthquake'. It is hard when our HoH messes up...guess you could always 'go Rogue' on him. ;) Seriously, there have been several blog posts regarding the HoH messing up and how to deal with it but bottom line...I am sure the love that you and Rick have for one another will help you work this out.

    Sending prayers and positive energy your way.

    Blessings,
    Cat

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    1. Thank you Cat :)

      Because we look to them to lead, it is so much harder when mistakes are made. However, how we deal with it is what is important. This has actually been harder on him and we are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  15. Hi Roz,
    I'm sorry about the tough time you and Rick are going through. But it sounds like you two are communicating and that's probably the best way to ge back on track. I'm sure it's tough deling with this and all of the aftershocks. I hope everything settles down soon
    Hugs,
    Ki

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    1. Thank you Kim :)

      We are communicating and you are right. Communication is so important in order to move forward. We are working through it and slowly moving forward. It has been difficult but we are slowly getting there.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  16. Hi Roz~

    I am sorry you all have hit a rough spot. In times like these it is so hard to learn to trust again...and continue down the path you set out on. It sounds like you all are talking things out...just keep doing that....talk about your fears and insecurities. You all will come through this just fine.

    (((Hugs)))

    ~Lucy

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    1. Thank you Lucy,

      It is a difficult process working through it and re-building trust, but we are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward. Time and patience are important too.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  17. Hugs glad to hear you both are okay considering the quakes. I believe that when the Hoh makes such mistakes as this it hurts more deeply to know we doubt them and it wavers our trust in them and the relationship. But with the love you and Rick have for each other I believe you both will come out of this stronger for it.

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    1. Thank you Angel :)

      This has been harder on Rick that I. As you say, the fact that my faith and trust have taken a knock has been hard for him. We are working through it and slowly moving forward and I'm sure we will come out of this even stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  18. I'm glad you're working through it and that the quakes haven't harmed you. thinking of you...

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    1. Thank you Renee :)

      It is hard, but we are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  19. Oh Roz, I'm so sorry you've been hurt and that you guys have had a hard time.

    Be strong, and believe in yourselves :)

    Lots of hugs x

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    1. Thank you so much Missy :)

      It has been hard, but we are communicating and working through it. I'm sure we will come out of this even stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  20. Hi Roz, :)

    I'm so sorry that you have had so much on your plate. I am sure that the earthquake thing is unnerving in and of itself. I am glad that you have some nice weather at present though.

    Our guys do make mistakes too and it is seemingly not fair that they get off free in a sense. As we all note they are human and stuff happens. I am sure that the disappointment in our eyes, and as you have said so well, our unconditional love anyway makes a statement to them. Stay strong! Many hugs, :)

    <3 Katie

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    1. Thank you so much Katie :)

      Yes, it has been rather unnerving. The aftershocks are still continuing, but we aren't really feeling them.

      It is hard when our guys make mistakes, but as you said, they are human and no-one is infallible. I have seen through this that there definitely are consequences for them, just different ones. This has been harder on him. We are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  21. Roz, how scary about the earthquakes. I'll be thinking of you and hoping all stays okay!

    As for the DD part I think it's so important to recognize what you did -- that they make mistakes too, but the consequences are different. It is tough when they mess up because there's a certain trust that needs to be in place and when they do something wrong, sometimes it's hard to trust or see their leadership. But of course everyone is only human, so this stuff happens. Looks like you handled it well at least and that you have a good attitude. I know you two will get it sorted out.

    (((hugs)))

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    1. Thank you so much Riley :)

      You are so right. Nobody is infallible and there definitely are consequences for them, just different ones ... knowing they have to regain our trust etc. We are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  22. Hey Roz,
    I'm hoping mother nature will get over her PMS soon and all will be back to normal. I could only imagine how scary that must be.

    Trust is very important in any relationship but the good thing is that once its broken it can be built up again. With time and love anything is possible. Everyone makes mistakes.

    Sending you big Hugs

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    1. Thank you Bonnie :)

      The aftershocks are still continuing, although we aren't feeling most of them.

      You are so right, trust can be regained. I think it is mostly going to take time now. We are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  23. Hi Roz. I'm sorry that I missed your previous post. It does indeed sound scary and I am thankful that things seem to be settling down again. I hope it remains that way.

    It is never fun when they mess up and do something that causes us to question them. From the outside the lack of consequences for our HoHs seem wrong but I don't feel that way. We have agreed to this dynamic and we understand this going in. None of us are perfect but if they are doing it right I think they try harder than before Dd because of this inequality.

    I know for us when this has happened and the balance is out of whack, it is often a role affirmation spanking that helps us to restore the balance and put the disappointment behind us. It clears the air and acts as a reset for us both. Weird but it works for us.

    I am happy you seem to be moving past this. It is often the challenging times when we learn and grow the most.

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    1. Thank you Zoe,

      Touch wood yes. The aftershocks are continuing, but were aren't feeling many.

      It is hard when our guys make a mistake. I have seen through this that there definitely are consequences for them too, just different ones .. knowing they have to regain our trust etc. I know this has been really hard on Rick. We are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Yes, I suppose a role affirmation spanking could help, because it does act as a reset for both of us as you said.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  24. Roz,
    I am a nervous wreck in earthquake country. I have learned to handle tornadoes and now hurricanes but earthquakes are so sudden and come without warning.

    I'm so sorry that you and Rick are in a hard spell. We too had old issues pop back up and really almost dissolve trust that we had been building and it hurts like crazy. You sound like you are handling it well and I trust that Rick is not just making amends but setting some of his own parameters in place so that he doesn't make the same mistake again.

    It is so hard for them when they mess up. We get a release and cleansing so to speak, from a spanking. They don't get that and have to deal with themselves. It's hard to watch, but MM says that it is good for them.

    Hope you two are doing better and better each day! This stuff is hard.

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    1. Thank you so much Susie :)

      Well, we do live in the 'shaky isles' LoL. That's the worst thing about quakes .. no warning. We do get them fairly regularly, but not usually this magnitude with this many aftershocks.

      Those old issues are more difficult aren't they? .. because especially living this lifestyle you don't expect them to resurface again. He is working on making sure the same thing doesn't happen again.

      You are so right too. There are definitely consequences for them, just different ones. This has been much harder for him and it his hard to watch.

      We are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  25. Roz, I so sorry that you two are having to deal with old issues. I hope you two are able to move past this and that you are able to find a way to trust Rick again. Yes, our guys make mistakes and we need to find a way to forgive. But when we make ourselves vulnerable and they do something to that cracks the trust we have honored them with, it takes some time to heal. Take good care of yourself right now! Sending you warm wishes.

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    1. Thank you so much Clara,

      I think you're right, it is mostly time now. It is hard, and it has been very hard for him but we are communicating and working through it. I'm sure we will come out even stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  26. Well, they may not have physical consequences, but they don't have the feeling of a 'clean slate' either. Dealing with guilt and uncertainty that weights you down or shakes your foundation because 'you' have caused your loved one pain would be far more painful than the worst barn burner of a spanking.

    Sometimes, I really and truly believe time is the answer. Sometimes, I think we need to board up the house, go to the basement and focus only on us and not the outside world in order to weather the storm. Sometimes we need to reach out and find someone who will listen and not judge. Sometimes we need to do ALL of those things. And sometimes we just need to stand exactly where we are and wait.

    Trust is easy to give on the onset, but difficult to find after you loose it. It is even more difficult to offer it up more than once. You will find a way. Your love dictates that.

    My only 'advice'- don't force the issue. Don't slap on a band aid and pray it fully heals. Allow the air at it. Let it heal in its own way, on its own time. It may itch for a while, but hopefully the scaring will be minimal.

    Faith. It is what I have in you two.

    Big Hugs, to you both
    willie

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    1. Hey Willie,

      Thank you so much. Everything you say makes perfect sense. You are so right, there are definitely consequences for them, just different ones. This has been so hard for him and I have actually been surprised by his reaction. He has taken it very seriously and is being quite hard on himself (in my opinion).

      I think you are right too. It is time. We are taking it slowly . We are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Thank you so much also for your support via email and chat. I can't tell you how much I appreciated it.

      Big Hugs
      Roz

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  27. You probably don't want our hearts to break for you, but mine did on this post. You are so good at putting what you feel into your words, and I could actually feel your pain. {{{HUGS}}} From reading a bit on DD from a man's perspective here or there, I think you are right that they have their own set of consequences. They have to carry the guilt when a good spanking would help get rid of ours. We get punished, but they have no such closure, and have to work on getting over their mistake. They also know how much we depend on them, and the pain must run deep when they realize how much we have been hurt. It may take a while for trust to really be reformed, but you guys can do it. I hear your love for him, and his for you, and pray you guys can come out of this stronger than before. {{{HUGS}}} I'll also be praying for your heart as you process and heal from what happened. He is so blessed to have you standing beside him, even when you're hurt.

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    1. Hi Es May,

      Thank you so much, you are such a sweetie! :) Thank you also for your emails and support. I can't express how much it meant to me.

      You are absolutely right. There are definitely consequences for them. They carry the guilt and the realisation they have caused hurt. This has been very hard for Rick and I think it is mostly time now. We are communicating and working through it and slowly moving forward. I'm sure we will come out of this even stronger.

      Big Hugs and thank you again
      Roz

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  28. Trust is such a big thing is any relationship, but especially in a marriage, and even more so when we are dd/ttwd. I'm sorry your trust took a hit; but like you said, you will weather this storm together.

    It's hard to be on either side of a broken trust issue, you know? And it takes time to rebuild afterwards, but when you are both committed to it, you will be able to repair the damage, and grow from the experience.

    It sounds like you are already in a good place in your heart towards him - I'm glad for that.

    hugs,
    Cali

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    1. Thank you Cali :)

      It has been difficult, especially for him, but we are working through it and slowly moving forward. I think time is the answer, plus patience to allow each other to feel and process what they need.

      I'm sure we will come out of this even stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  29. I'm sorry that you have been having a rough time- I hope things get better for you. ((hugs))

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    1. Thank you Saturn :)

      We are working through it and slowly moving forward. It is definitely starting to feel better now.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  30. Oh my goodness, Roz. I had no idea you were dealing with so much, and I am so sorry for that :( I really do hope that things look up and that you and Rick are able to get through it all. I really have missed being in touch with everyone, and so sorry that nature had such awful plans!

    Hugs,
    Marie

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    1. Thank you so much Marie :)

      It has been difficult, and very hard on him, but we are working through it and slowly moving forward.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  31. I'm so sorry, Roz. It's especially hard to be dealing with an old issue..so difficult to trust again. Like square zero. Good job granting forgiveness.

    Where I have felt its unfair before is when my hoh screws up- I get TICKED, and I get spanked for my reaction. I hate that!

    I agree, I do think there are consequences for our husbands, and perhaps even worse for them because it takes them awhile to forgive themselves.

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    1. Thank you so much Stormy ... it's great to see you :)

      You know, the old issues are so hard because with living this lifestyle you really don't expect them to crop up again. Rebuilding trust is hard. I think it is mostly time now. We are communicating, working through it and slowly moving forward.

      I have seen through this that there are definitely consequences for them. This has been difficult for Rick and yes, forgiving himself is the hard part.

      Oh yes, getting spanked for your reaction to his mistake sucks doesn't it?

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  32. Im so sorry i'm just getting around to this now. :( I hope by now, things have picked up a bit and there's a brighter outlook. Struggles happen in life, but it's how you get through them that counts. Usually it can bring you even closer as a couple. I hope that's what it does for you two!

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    1. Thank you Kenzie :)

      We are working through it and slowly moving forward. We are more connected again and things are much brighter now.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  33. I'm sorry your post didn't come up on my blog roll...

    If we don't have stepping stones to go over and rough patches to sew up then we can't grow...I know u will come out stronger..big hugs and hopefully an update soon

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    1. Thank you Daisy :)

      We are working through things and moving forward. You are right. I think we are going to come out of this stronger.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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    2. I'm so glad to read you are working through it and very optimistic about the strength it is building. That just proves how much you do forgive Rick, and yearn for His leadership.

      How are the earthquakes and aftershocks, etc? Have they settled down?

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    3. Thank you HS :)

      Yes, we are working through things and slowly regaining confidence and trust and moving forward. We are taking it slowly and I'm hoping we will come out of this even stronger.

      Things had settled with the earthquakes, but unfortunately, we were hit yesterday with another big one .. 6.6. It was so scary, even more so as this time we were at work in the city. It was pretty chaotic. So begins another round of aftershocks, a few of them have been pretty big. What can you do eh?

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  34. We all make mistakes. This is true. There are always consequences, even if simply the knowledge that we have hurt someone we love and care about and having to take responsibility for those actions. I am sure with love the wounds will heal in time. Trust is so important in any relationship and once lost hard to gain back. I was hurt several months ago by my husband who unintentionally deceived me about something - to someone hearing the tale of what happened it could seem almost a silly story and even I can laugh at it now, but at the time, my heart ached a lot. I think it has mended, but the memory of that hurt is still there. Though I know my hubby never meant to hurt me, though I know his love is true. I hope your heart and his heals soon. Thinking of you and sending hugs, Terps

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    1. Hi Terps,

      Thank you so much, and thank you for sharing your story. It's good you can laugh about it now, but as you say, the memory is still there.

      Trust is so important, and so difficult to regain once lost. We are working through things and slowly regaining that trust and confidence and moving forward. It is going to take some time and we are taking it slowly.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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