Internet Rules

From reading other blogs I notice that quite a number of DD wives have an internet allowance or curfew placed on them by their husbands and I have stupidly commented on this to my husband.  Yeah, I know - not a smart move!

Today my husband lectured warned me about my blogging and internet time (yikes!).

We were talking about my blog and others I had read and commented on (he keeps an eye on what I post on here) and he said that I was not to let it become an obsession or start feeling pressure to keep posting.  He told me if he saw this happening, or I started neglecting other tasks because I was on the computer he would ban me from it.  He even said he would post here himself telling readers he had banned me (oh boy!).  

My husband's HoHy'ness has gone into hyper drive recently, or so it seems to me.  He has become more dominant generally and notices every (and I mean EVERY) tiny little thing I do and the tiniest bit of attitude.  I'm not quite sure what has brought this on, but it's like he has opened up the DD throttle to full!  Although it means having to watch my R&R's (rules and respect) more closely, it has made us even closer and has made me feel even more cared for.

I think I am going to have to be very careful with my use of the internet - I really, really don't want my husband to introduce an internet rule or to be banned! 

Wish me luck. He is serious about this.  

Oh, and if I suddenly disappear for a while you'll know why - my husband will tell you :(

Spoilt Happy Place

I was having a lovely conversation with my husband today.  It was nice and intimate and romantic.  Whispering sweet nothings .. yada yada yada - you know.  I was in my happy place.

Then ... At one point during the conversation I said

"what did I do to deserve you" 

My charming and extremely Witty husband replied (with a mischievous grin on his face)

"darling, you deserve EVERYTHING I give you.  Don't you agree?"

Poof.  Happy place gone, just like that!  Did he really have to say that? - Jeez!

Gotta love him.  He always finds little ways to remind me of our roles.

At least he has a good sense of humour right? Not that it saves me from trouble!

Protective HoH

It's not rocket science to most of us that ttwd makes our husband's feel more protective.  This protectiveness is also the foundation to many rules.  Fair enough I guess, do nothing dangerous is one of the 4 d's after all isn't it?

It can sometimes be a little frustrating however.  Particularly when there is something you really really really want to do, or somewhere you really, really, really want to go and protective hubby emerges and says no with a capital N Argh!

Yesterday afternoon I went out to spend some girl time with some friends.  Whenever I go out, if my husband is not home when I leave he insists that I inform him via text when I am leaving so that he knows I am on the road.  He also likes me to text him when I return home if he is not there so that he knows I am back safe.  He will sometimes insist on this even if I am just going to the supermarket!  Hassle anyone??

Anyway, hubby was going to be out for the evening so would not be home when I returned.  I got home and had some chores to catch up on.  I knew I should text him as soon as I got home to let him know I was back.  But, you guessed it, Nope, I got stuck into the chores I had to finish instead and didn't text.  A little while later the following text arrived.

Babe, thought I would have heard from you by now.  What are you up to???

Oops!  Rick was obviously not too happy, and worried (this is never a good thing).  A point he reinforced when he got home (thankfully not with a spanking)!

Yep, the uber protective hubby can be frustrating and can really hamper a girl.

I wouldn't have it any other way.  I love that he feels so protective of me, it makes me feel cared for.  He has always been protective but it's something else that has increased ten fold with ttwd.

The Benefits of DD

I just love the extra closeness, intimacy and increased communication that DD brings.  Today my darling husband came up to me and said "oh, I have to tell you something". "Oh?" I replied a little warily, wondering what was coming next.  He said, "you walked past me earlier and I was watching you thinking how beautiful you are.  It made me all mushy, I am so proud.  I just had to tell you that"

Awe I hear you say.  Needless to say I melted on the spot.  I don't think the smile has left my face.

We have always been fairly good at communication and sharing feelings but this has certainly increased heaps since we started DD.

Yep, I love the benefits of DD.  True, it's definitely not for sissy's and can be tough going at times (then again, what relationship isn't)?  But the benefits are far worth it.  For us the benefits have been more than either of us imagined.

Domestic Discipline is like the Army

In my last post I talked about "our kind of maintenance".  To recap, we have what my husband calls a weekly "review" where we discuss how the previous week has been, how our relationship is going, the rules etc and my behaviour during the week.  If I have committed any infractions I am spanked, if not, there is no spanking.

I am aware that maintenance for most involves spanking, whether there has been any infraction or not and I understand the reasons given for maintenance spanking.  My husband is not a fan of spanking for no infraction.  Hence "our kind of maintenance".

In my post I wondered whether a spanking is actually required in order to achieve the desired results of maintenance, or whether the discussion alone is enough.  Following on from this, I was having a discussion with my husband a few days later and asked him why he though it was that it seems to take punishment, or the threat of, to ensure the 4 D's are adhered to.  After all, this lifestyle is consensual, both parties agree to it and want to run their relationship according to it's parameters.  I actually want to show my husband the respect he deserves, follow his leadership and rules etc.  So why is it that punishment, or the threat of is required in order to ensure I do follow his leadership?

My husband's reply was this.

I think it's just human nature.  Domestic discipline is like the Army

Yes, you heard right, but I'll repeat it - Domestic discipline is like the Army.

What??  

My husband then went on to explain that in the Army there are multiple people all working towards the same goal, each with their own ideas of how to get there.  If everyone in the Army did things according to their own ideas and ideals chaos would ensue as they would not be working together collectively and the end goal would not be met.  Therefore, the Army has a hierarchy, those who set the course and the boundaries and those who follow.  It also has a chief who ultimately sets the direction for the rest of the Army to follow.  Sanctions are also in place as a deterrent from straying from the set path.

I thought my husband very clever for coming up with this analogy.  In domestic discipline a couple share the same goal, to enhance their relationship and the closeness between them.  It is the husband who sets the direction the relationship will take in order to each the goal.

Now - back to maintenance - how has this been going for me I hear you ask?

Well, I'm ashamed to say that only one session so far has resulted in no spanking due to several minor infractions occurring.  It seems to avoid being spanked during maintenance I have to be squeaky clean having committed absolutely no infractions. Sigh!