Thursday 28 March 2013

Spanking and Tolerance Levels

It sometimes baffles me how my tolerance to spanking can alter (quite dramatically sometimes it seems) from one spanking to the next.  I know that there are a lot of factors that come into play such as implement choice, position, the intensity of the spanking etc.  State of mind and physical condition (whether I am feeling 100% or not) I think are also huge factors.

Going into any spanking I have a rough idea, or at least I think I do, of what it will feel like and how I will tolerate it.  I have had enough experience to gauge these things LoL.

Generally, I have a fairly high tolerance and if I were honest, can probably handle more.  But every now and then though I surprise both myself and Rick with my reaction.  Last Saturday was one of those times.

Rick was spanking away merrily and I very quickly started squirming and ouching strongly.  It hurt!  More than I had expected it would and I was having a very hard time.  I think it must have been a record for me.

During a pause I said to him "why does it hurt like hell more some times than others?"  He very gently said "It just works that way sometimes honey" and went back to spanking me (nice guy that he is).

He did ease up a bit though, but tears very quickly started to trickle.  Not a full on cry, I find it very difficult to fully let go and openly cry but there was a slow trickle which is unusual for me.  He lay on the bed beside me and pulled me into him.  "Tears" he said in a surprised tone.  I weakly smiled at him and said "It's all good.  This is good".  "It's very good" was his reply.

He briefly continued spanking but with less intensity then scooped me up and sat me on his lap where we cuddled for a bit before telling me to get on my knees on the floor for some .... um ... other activities.  A little while later I was back OTB for round two.

I have no idea in this case why it was that I didn't cope with this spanking the same as I usually do.

45 comments:

  1. Just as you said I think it has to do with our thoughts and emotions at the time.

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    1. Hi Sunny, thank you. Yes I think so. Also other factors such as hormones.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  2. Roz,
    Wonderful post as usual :)
    It's so interesting you included tears with tolerance. Both have so much to do with emotional & physical state.
    MrBB

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    1. Hi Mr BB,

      Thank you :) Your comment got me thinking. I suppose tears and tolerance don't always go hand in hand. There are times tears may fall from the emotion involved and we haven't reached our physical tolerance and other times we may reach our limit yet there are no tears.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  3. Roz, I have given a lot of thought about the crying during a spanking, be it punishment or maintenance, and I have yet to shed tears. However, I've only been paddled twice so I'm new and I obviously don't know much, but I think showing that kind of emotion is a good sign that there's something going on in your heart that's troubling you. JMO.

    I hope you're ok. {{}}
    m.

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    1. Hi Maryanne, Welcome! Thank you for reading and for your comment. I will pay you a visit at your place :)

      I have difficulty usually crying during a spanking. Sometimes I wish I could so that I can release. But, lack of tears certainly does not mean the spanking hasn't worked, or hasn't made us feel more connected.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  4. Hey Roz...as you said, state of mind and physical condition can impact our reactions and so can thoughts, emotions...even lack of sleep can also impact them.

    Rick seems to be reading you just fine. ;)

    Hope you both have a wonderful weekend.

    Blessings,
    Cat

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    1. Hi Cat, Thank you. I guess there are any number of things that can have an impact on our reactions. Rick certainly does know how to read me.

      Hope you are having a wonderful weekend too :)

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  5. Oh bless Roz, every time is different isn't it? I think tears are a good thing really, always make me feel better anyway, have a good weekend
    love Jan.xx

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    1. Hi Jan,

      Thank you :) Every time is different for sure and I agree, tears are a good thing as they give you that release.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  6. No one can be at the same level all the time, we being human change from one moment to another and sometimes at a drop of a dime so why would your response to your spanking be any different?

    As for the tears only you can answer that.

    Bob

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    1. Hi Bob, you are so right. and for sure, no two spankings are ever the same.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  7. I believe hormones play a part in this also, where we are in our cycle will affect our tolerance, physically and emotionally. There are times when I can’t handle as much and I feel like I’m failing in some way, that I should be able to handle it because I am able to at other times. I know I’m not really failing, it’s just the way it is and where I am at the moment.

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    1. Hi Jacquie, thank you. Oh I agree that hormones play a part as well. I also somehow feel I am failing if this happens, even though logically I know I'm not really failing.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  8. Definitely hormones and mood...length of time since your last spanking...so many things can have an impact. Even though this one was more stingy than you were anticipating, it sounds like it was effective for you:)

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    1. Hi Tess,

      Oh yes, length of time between spankings definitely plays a part too.

      I guess I do have to admit that it was effective - humph

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  9. Enjoyed the post. Thanks.

    You said it yourself, depends on state of mind.

    Have a wonderful Easter.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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    1. HI Ronnie,

      Thank you :) Happy Easter to you and Ron as well. I hope you are having a wonderful weekend.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  10. I know I respond differently at different times too. Sometimes I have way more tolerance, others barely any. The crying is more a state of my emotions. I don't cry for pain much.

    I hope that it was a release for you!

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    1. Hi Minelle,

      Thank you. I guess no two spankings are the same. I have difficulty with crying during a spanking and wish it would happen more often in order to get that release. I think though, when it does happen, for me it is a combination of emotions and pain.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  11. I really don't understand all of the emotions and release tied to this lifestyle yet. I don't normally cry during a spanking. Sometimes I feel an emotional release afterwards, but not always unfortunately. I think more of the release is tied to how I'm feeling. Whether or not I'm able to "give" myself over to him.

    It sounds like Rick understands that sometimes it's different. Maybe it's part of the letting go everyone talks about and keeping your head out of the moment. Let your HoH lead your heart to where it needs to be. Just some of my thoughts, C

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    1. Hi Clara,

      I don't normally cry either, but sometimes wish I could cry more in order to get that release. However, lack of crying doesn't mean the spanking has met it's purpose, or made us feel more connected.

      I think you're right and that, at least it part, it is tied in to giving ourselves over and making ourselves more vulnerable.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  12. Enjoyed the post. Thanks.

    You said it yourself, depends on state of mind.

    Have a wonderful Easter.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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  13. I am more in the Catrinka camp when it comes to spankings. I some how 'leave' my body and feel nothing...emotionally or physically. About an hour later I 'feel' the spanking, and I do notice the affects of it in my mindset...just none of it at the time of the actual spanking.

    It makes things very difficult for Barney. Oops...this is not about me :)

    Happy Easter!
    love to you both~ willie

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    1. Okay bad friend I meant CLARA's camp! I don't know where Catrinka is camping these days :)

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    2. Hey Willie,

      LoL, yes, I wonder where Catrinka is camping these days?

      I'm similar in that I don't usually release at the time, but I do notice it in my mindset and fell squiffy afterwards. I have been known to release some of the emotion hours later sometimes.

      Lots of love and Happy Easter to you, B and the boys

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  14. I am glad that I am not the only one this happens to. I always think of excuses for why it is happening. But who knows? We have tried different warm ups and different paddles and different everything, truly I believe it is me. And the second set of spankings, after the "floor exercises" is always the easiest for me. Thanks for sharing and voicing one of my questions.

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    1. Hi Blondie,

      Thank you and you're welcome :) You are certainly not alone and it seems there are any number of factors that influence our tolerance. "Floor exercises", I love it!

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  15. Thanks for this post Roz - I thought I was the only one who felt all these emotions during a spanking. It would be good if others here could post on Tolerance. It certainly does differ each time. You are positive an implement has absolutely no effect one time and nearly consign it to the bin, and then the next time it is used it's unbearable. We don't have a wooden paddle yet (gleeful giggle!) but I have noticed that just a hand spanking can go off the richter scale at times! If you come up with any further explanations, let me know!

    Many hugs and have a lovely Easter

    Ami

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    1. Hi Ami,

      Thank you and you're welcome. I'm glad I posted this because it seems a few of us were thinking/wondering the same thing. No two spankings are the same for sure.

      Your comment about being about to consign an implement to the bin only to find it unbearable the next time is exactly what happened in this case. We don't have a wooden paddle either (thank goodness), but we do have a wooden spoon that is dense enough that it's almost like a paddle.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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    2. Oh help! I have loads of the wretched things in the kitchen! I shall have to hope Starman never puts two and two together!

      Hugs

      Ami

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    3. Oh dear Ami, you might want to throw out the denser ones, just in case!

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    4. There are times when I think the only dense one around here is me!

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    5. LoL, now I'm sure that's not true Ami :)

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  16. my answer is this - hormones, emotions, hunger level, time of month, and level of humidity. In other words, no two spanking scenarios are the same. Hence the difference in response.

    HUGS.

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    1. Hi Fondles,

      Thank you. It seems there are any number of factors that come into play. You are right too, no two spankings are the same.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  17. There are so many factors that affect one's tolerance as many have mentioned so nicely - mood, hormones, emotions, implement, time of day, preparation, state of mind at the time... I learned from a doctor that it is in fact true that the week before one's menstrual cycle one is more sensitive to pain. It is something I had observed of myself but did not know if it was just me feeling that way. I cry out of emotion...I have never cried during a spanking...and not sure my husband would ever go so far as to encourage that as usually he does anything he can to avoid seeing me cry - he does not understand that it is a release for me...and then I am fine... Hugs, Terps

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    1. Hi Terps,

      Thank you. Interesting that we are more sensitive to pain at certain times in our cycle. I don't normally cry and I'm not sure how my husband feels about it either, but I do know he is starting to understand that it is a release.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  18. I think that's part of what makes us women. :) We always changing, what pleases us one day, may annoy us another. And the same is how we take a spanking. It sounds like it was a beautiful day all around though. :) {{{HUGS}}}

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    1. Hi Es May,

      We are fickle creatures aren't we? LoL. It does seem that there are a number of factors that influence our tolerance level. Although it was a bit more ouchy than I had bargained on, it was a good connection :)

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  19. It's very much as you said for me, Roz. It's an individualized combination of my state of mind, the purpose of the spanking, the implement, to quote Willie - horror-moans (ugh). Sometimes, just like here it's something that's said in the pauses that can be my undoing.

    (((hugs)))

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    1. Hi June,

      Thank you :) The purpose and implement definitely have a big impact on how we react. There are any number of factors that can affect our tolerance so it seems.

      Hugs,
      Roz

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  20. I didn't read the comments so I'm sure it has been said a dozen times but for me it is emotional and hormonal. It literally hurts more depending on where I am in my cycle. It also hurts more when I am amped up emotionally. My hubby teases and says "sensitive spirit, sensitive bum." I say GRRR...but he is right.

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    1. Hey Susie,

      I hadn't really thought about hormones but some of the other ladies also mentioned it and thinking about it yes, I guess it does play a big part. Don't you hate it when they're right! Grrr

      Hugs,
      Roz

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