Thursday 22 March 2012

The Trouble With Texting

I have been feeling good lately with the fact that I haven't been in any sort of trouble with Rick for a little while.  We have been enjoying life together and things have been great between us.  Over the last couple of weeks we have attended a wedding and birthday celebrations with friends.

Well, the bubble has sadly burst and I find myself in trouble once again.  Much to my own disappointment and worse, the knowledge that I have disappointed Rick.

As I have mentioned before, we are not always able to be together and during times apart we rely on regular contact via text.

When Rick is home he determines bedtime.  When apart, unless I text him to say I am heading to bed first, he will text and tell me to head to bed when he feels the time is right (usually when he decides to turn in himself).  He does this because I am terrible about going to bed.  I don't usually, on my own accord, head to bed at a reasonable enough hour to get adequate sleep and consequently am usually sleep deprived and running on adrenalin most of the time.  It doesn't help that I suffer on and off with insomnia.  Rick is never unreasonable about bedtimes.  In fact, we usually still end up going to bed too late!

The other night I made the mistake of leaving my phone in another room instead of having it on me.  It was looming bedtime when I knew Rick would be texting at any moment with his usual bedtime call.  It did occur to me that I should retrieve the phone so that I didn't miss his text, and also that I should probably start making bedtime preparations anyway.  But - for some reason, I know not what, I didn't and as a consequence it was close to 20 minutes after he sent the text that I finally saw it.  I quickly replied and apologised and said I would get organised and into bed straight away.  The result was that I was in bed far later than he wanted.  (It takes me so long to get organised!).

We discussed this yesterday (well, Rick did most of the talking!) and, as well as my failure to have my phone handy to ensure I didn't miss his bedtime text, Rick also told me I was not keeping in contact when we are apart as much as he would expect.  As a result, I now have a set time by which I must text him in the evening when we are apart, and a timeframe within which I am to respond to his texts.  He also said we will "talk" more about what happened the other night and that he is considering whether any further action is warranted on his part. (Darn!)

So - I now wait for him to make his decision and for further "discussion".  In the meantime I think I will ensure I keep my phone glued to me and my finger poised over the reply button!! - Sigh!!

Better end this post - I have a text to send!

Sunday 11 March 2012

Confucius

I was feeling a little mischievous this morning (or is that dangerous? reckless?) and decided to wind my wonderful husband up.  It also happened to be on a subject he is passionate about.

Deciding perhaps it may be timely (and very wise!) to call it quits, I cheekily conceded that perhaps I shouldn't be attempting to wind him up or annoy him.

His response ....

Remember what Confucius said - Wind up your husband, soon have sore bottom!

Don't think I've heard that one before, I said.  My husband assured me it was one of his most famous sayings and one he thought all dd wives would know!

I repeated that it certainly wasn't one I knew and he replied sure you will remember it from now on, won't you?

Hmm - I sure hope so - the next time I feel a little mischievous!!!



Friday 9 March 2012

Lesson Learned

I have been going through a phase for the last two weeks, one my husband hasn't been too impressed with!  For some inexplicable reason I have been breaking several rules, one after the other, and even the same rules several times!

What has gotten into me?  I don't know.  I have not been on my game, not been as respectful and obedient to my husband as I should be.  Am I testing the boundaries?  Am I getting a tad lazy?  The truth is that I honestly don't know, but I think perhaps in some part it is a combination of the above.

My husband has been most patient and (thankfully) lenient, particularly given that keeping to the rules is usually something he is very strict on.  Perhaps this leniency in part contributed to the continuing rule breaking?

Each episode was discussed and I received several lectures and finally told I was on a "final warning" and if the rule breaking continued I would be spanked.

Come on girl, what has gotten into you?  Focus, get back on track.  You can do it - unless you want to end up OTK - hmm -  no, thank you very much!

The other day I made a decision that I considered minor and one I never considered my husband would be concerned about.  Decision made, I acted upon it and told my husband afterwards believing he would have no problem with it.

  WRONG!!!

Turns out it indeed was a decision I should have discussed with him - and apparently I should have known that (argh!).  He told me that although the decision was minor, it was the principle.  How can he lead us and make good decisions for us if I go ahead and make decisions without him?  It undermined his position as our leader and was therefore also disrespectful to him.

...and...

I was spanked for it.  He told me this was the last straw on top of all the rule breaking lately which he had been lenient on.  I was totally blindsided.  I honestly hadn't thought about how my actions undermined him and thought he would be fine with it.

Before

Before any punishment my husband always makes a point of explaining why I am to be punished and I am required to acknowledge my actions and apologise.  He also makes a point of explaining what he wants me to "take" from the punishment and what I should do the next time in the same situation.

During

During any punishment my husband usually tells me what he expects of me and asks me questions to "test" that the message is getting through.  Why does he do that??  does he not realise my mind is focussed elsewhere and not on answering questions? Argh!!!  Well, you guessed it.  I delivered some ill-considered responses which earned me extra swats.

After

After punishment my husband asks me what I have learned from it and what I should do next time.  I am required to answer him and apologise.

Lesson learned!  - I now understand that by not involving him in decisions (even those I think may be minor) I am undermining his authority and being disrespectful.

I think I am also over my "phase" now.  At least, I hope so!!


btw - It is not a good idea to leave an open can of cat food unattended on the kitchen bench just before a spanking!! 

Once the spanking was over, my husband left me in position for a little while to think about why I was punished.  (His version of post spanking corner time).  During this time he went into the kitchen and discovered the cat on the bench emptying the can - Oops!!